The White Sheep

            Since I had already written about the black sheep of the group, I think that it is only fitting to write about the white sheep of the group. The lady that is completely innocent to the world. It just so happens that this particular lady is my wife. I truly think that she has never had a "dirty" or "mean" thought about anyone in her whole life! I love this woman dearly, and hope that she never changes. There are many reasons why I want her to stay the same, but one in particular is her inability to pick up on innuendos.

            We love the holidays because it is a great time to show your love for others through a very superficial way of gifts. Well, a family that we are close to has a son that is almost three, and so we thought that is would be a great idea to get him Kung Fu Panda 2 (Mostly because every time I walk into a retail store, that move was playing, and I got hooked). We of course gave it to Atticus (the little boy), and sat down to watch this movie. If you know anything about this movie, you know that a panda use to work with his father (a goose) in a noodle shop. Then the panda is pick to the dragon warrior, and all the while Atticus' dad and I are joking about noodles in a very inappropriate way.

            At some point in the movie the panda is on his back, lifting his head up as much as possible, sticking his tongue out trying to eat this one little dangling noodle. Kyle, Atticus' dad decides this to be the perfect time to crack another joke. He glances to his wife, and says, "That reminds me of you, when you want a special noodle." Of course he said it loud enough for the adults to hear, and I started to bust up laughing.  His wife is now completely red in the face, is giggling out of embarrassment.

            Curious as to why only Kyle and I were laughing, i looked to my wife, and she was puzzled by the statement. She is just staring at us and finally breaks down to say, "It isn't safe to eat noodles on your back like that. You could choke." Now Kyle is laughing even harder, and I leaned in to my wife and explained to her that the "noodle" was a metaphor for something else. My is a dark skinned lady and I kid you not, the bright red on an HD TV wasn't even close to how red her face became.

            After the movie she didn't say much, but what she did say will stick with me forever. "Boys... I tell you, you are just dirty filthy creatures. No wait, you're men! Not boys! Men are the dirty filthy creatures!" Priceless.